Although people who practice erotic dominance and submission might be considered immoral by their enemies, they are in most cases actually deeply moral people. It is not immoral in itself to be into making sex with your adult partner as spicy as you both desire, unless your morality system finds something wrong with enjoying sex in itself. Many perfectly moral people do not subscribe to such a restrictive definition of moral behavior... and rightfully so.
It could reasonably be argued that the true immorality is in artificially and painfully restricting the approved ways that love might find expression. Not that we object to painful restriction in itself, but, was it consensual? I don't remember agreeing, with everyone else, that Judeo-Christian codes of behavior would be the only official ones. Well, if I did, they should have got it in writing, because I'm denying it now.
Even if their were no traditions, time-tested and venerable (which there are), that bless multiple relationships, and erotic freedom in general, we'd have to invent one. The time is ripe to accept human nature as it is instead of trying in vain to torque it out of shape to fit some artificial ideal. Face it, homosexuality and bisexuality are here to stay. There will always be bossy men and women who will naturally attract their admirers. Humans are not invariably monogamous, if we were, we would be unable to even question the wisdom of the practice. There are such things as instincts, and we've all got 'em, but they are not what they're "supposed to be." Get real!
People in the D&S community worldwide are generations ahead of the rest of the world, in recognizing and providing for the fantastic diversity of human nature. Among us you will find dominant women with many slave men, dominant men with whole harems of slave women, men who are dominant at home and submissive on the town, women who are dominant or submissive depending on their whim and their partner, Bisexual switches who insist on the best of all worlds, transvestites both sub and dom, etc. even, yes, monogamous married heterosexuals, all of whom find a haven within our international nation.
With all these millions of kinky folks agreeing to cheerfully disagree about how to play out your love life, you'd think that you'd find some underlying law, code, rules or precepts to keep them organized and on track, and you'd be right. Of course, not every one who's kinky agrees to them. Like the difference between being homosexual or Gay, you can be kinky without ever being a "leatherfolk" Many homosexual and bisexual men and women do not identify as "Gay", they don't join in on the togetherness concept. Similarly, many kinky people do not want to hang out and get chummy with other pervy types, although they don't mind having sex with them. This is because they already have a moral code, thank you, and probably never will feel ready to open their arms to this wild and woolly "new" one.
Should they? I think so, and I'll tell you why: because accepting yourself and those like yourself leads to mental and emotional health. People who are mentally and emotionally healthy can operate from an inner position of strength, instead of weakness. You have more energy for life's challenges, because you aren't holding yourself back anymore, which means you can be more of a help to humanity.
To indulge yourself in a philosophy that cuts you off from your best possible self is what's really immoral. We have a responsibility to ourselves, and to those who depend on us, to live honestly and well, and that includes meeting our own needs how ever we must. If we get a little hot help from our friends, good for us.
copyright © 1999
gloria-brame.com
All Rights Reserved